Monday, December 12, 2011

The Plan: How To Get Health Insurance

Workaholism is a good place to start.  I clock about 36 hours a week as a credit and housing counselor for a local non-profit.  On Friday and Saturday I put in another 16 or so hours at the Harvest Moon Grille uptown.  My Sundays?  Wide open after church and catching up on laundry, grocery shopping, and housework.  Obviously I needed to take on a new project.  Introducing....
[this is a valid email address for all your custom craft needs]

I've always liked sewing and spray paint.  Now I'm hoping that people will pay me to do it.  I've put a few things up for sale at the Sleepy Poet where Abe works: Christmas ornaments made with feathers from our hens, paper trees made from old trashy novels, reusable chalkboard gift tags, etc.
I also put up Christmas lights.
[shout out to Lexi, who contributed tireless labor in painting and set-up. We paid her in home brews and rabbit dinner.] 

It's slow going, selling small craft items for a few dollars apiece.  I probably would have gotten bored and moved on to another project by now (rearranging the living room! remembering how to knit scarves! reconsidering grad school!  I've been a bit manic lately).  But the Harvest Moon Grille where I spend my weekends ordered 15 of those paper trees (shown left) to use as holiday decorations on the tables.  They turned out to be so stinking adorable that a week later, I've taken more than $350 in orders for my crafts. 

A girl could get health insurance for that kind of money.  So that is The Plan.  100% of the profits from my craft sales (I'm crossing my fingers that there are some) and Abe's antique sales at the Sleepy Poet  will directly support some corporate health insurance provider.  And, of course, our farm -- because without a healthy farmer, what we actually have is a fenced backyard with a poultry infestation. Much less charming.

A better planner would have come up with a name and a business plan for this venture, but do I look like I have time for that?  I have to make hundreds-of-dollars-worth of Christmas ornaments and a whole paper forest between my regular day job and my regular night job.  So I'll take your reasonable and witty suggestions, please, and I'll thank you with something hand-crafted if you come up with a winning name and supply a postal address.


  1. I totally just tried to comment and failed. Lists of brilliant company names gone... Just kidding. They all sucked. Either way, I'm happy to pay retail for anything you create. Bring on the online store! Miss you.


  2. Go, crafty kiddo! Loved your post, love your creations, love you. Wish you were here to help me figure out a way to decorate for Christmas with no decorations, no time, no money and little hope for making it special. I'm desperate enough to hand Paul some paper and scissors and command snowflakes.

  3. I mean, I don’t have health insurance, and dental work is really an issue, but the feeling that life is worth living?


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